What is your definition of success?

Success is something that we all feel pressure to be defined by and everyone’s perception of success is different.

In this video I ask three questions to help you come up with your definition of success in a way that is aligned with you.

1.       What is success to you?

2.       Why do you want your own success?

3.       Who do you feel in your life is an influence who has been successful?

Success comes from within but it’s also about how you feel about yourself. Everyone’s definition of it will be different because we are all unique in our own way. We come from different families, backgrounds and learn different values. Some of the values passed down to us may not be in alignment with us. For example, it’s becoming more common for many more women to go and study and earn incomes in countries that didn’t previously encourage this etc.

Many of the women I talk to feel a constant pressure to be a “successful mum”, “successful career women” successful wife etc. The list goes on. Truth is success isn’t about what others want for you but what you want for yourself.

If you strive for success for the wrong reasons it will show up. I have seen this with women who are seeking money for the wrong reasons. We all need money to help us pay for everything in life but if your values are about helping and creating for others and your job and career doesn’t fit this then this will impact on your success. The definition of success according to Collins dictionary “is the achievement of a high position in a particular field, for example in business or politics.” A lot of people define success in terms of their work and although this definition mirrors this it can sometimes be the overriding need to succeed that make many of us feel unhappy at work. If you are different to your family and friends you deserve your own definition of success don’t let it define you.

Many people see successful people and don’t see what may of come before that. In life many of these successful people have had to overcome something to get there. Life isn’t without struggle and this the common thread I see with people I know who are truly successful.

Imposter syndrome can also be linked to this need for success. This is something I spoke about in a post I did about my career unhappiness story see blog here.  Many of us feel we are chasing a cornfield that doesn’t exist when it comes to success and this makes us question who we are. Trust me I have done it myself.

Success should be about your wants, needs and what you want to do. It’s never about anyone else. A person who runs a well-known café in your area may be a success vs a project manager in a top IT company. It’s not about what looks better on paper necessarily this is something we have projected as a society. Sometimes if influential people online who sometimes make others feel inadequate. If you don’t want that it’s ok to admit this.

Success is a different for everyone because we all want different things. Not everyone wants a white picket fence, five-bedroom house etc. I am not saying you shouldn’t aim for more you should but do it because it’s what you want.

If you want to find out more about how I can help you with your version of success why not consider looking at the career mentoring services I offer here

My career unhappiness story

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Here’s how it began

I was sitting in the doctors, when I started crying, I wondered is he going to think I'm completely nuts for crying he was a nice caring doctor. He gave me a tissue and reassured me that it was okay to cry, he wasn't going to judge me because I felt silly for crying. This happened in my mid 20s whilst going through the redundancy process it was so stressful the uncertainty of not knowing where I was going next was adding to this stress.

Everyone in my community of my generation are doctors, dentists, accountants, lawyers etc all the professions which are highbrow. I was never academic and couldn't pursue any of those professions. I'm not saying that I'm not intelligent, I've worked hard to be where I am. I know who I am. I know my opinion counts, it's why I created a business.

It can be very easy for all of us to feel like things are against us when you feel like you are not the brightest, not the smartest etc. We can all feel like failures we can feel as though we are not enough. I'm sharing this story with you, because I remember when I didn't get selected to be in my team I and was made redundant, that it wasn't anybody's fault. It was the universe's way of telling me that I was meant to learn and grow and do different things. I was grateful for the experience. And I was lucky I started a new job. I lost my job on the Friday started a new one on the Monday.

Imposter syndrome

I felt thankful that I had a job. When you go through something like redundancy, where you feel like a failure, or you have imposter syndrome which was what was happening to me when I went to this new job. I thought, who was to be in this job? I hadn't interviewed for this job, I've got the job through being redeployed. It's a seemed like a pity job. It knew wasn't a Pity job, but it seemed like that at the time. This voice wouldn't go away the inner voice, the imposter syndrome. The how did I end up here? What am I doing with my life? The who am I to be here voice came up and I felt I wasn’t good enough.  

Then when my cousin was diagnosed with a very serious health condition, I was devastated. I remember thinking because he was a year older than me, he had a very good job and worked for IBM. I thought what if that had been me? I remember I couldn't sleep properly at night, I was worrying. I was thinking, what was I going to do next, what direction was I going to go in? Luckily, I was living at home with my mom or my sister. So, it wasn't as though the world was going to come to an end in terms of finances and emotional support.

I think one of the reasons I found the whole redundancy process so stressful is because of how long it took it.  Sadly, my cousin died two years after that he suffered a lot, he had stomach cancer. Bad things happen, but it it's how we deal with the bad stuff and we can move forward and create something new. Really think about what you want? I knew that being that unhappy was not something where I was doing a disservice to myself. I wanted to write, I wanted to travel, I wanted to live my life because I kept on thinking if my cousin can get ill. What could happen to me? I hadn't even met my husband them. So I left my job to start a fresh and 5 years on I have this business where I help women find their version of career happiness.

Start making a change sooner rather then later.

If you feel like you're a failure, if you feel like you're not good enough, if you feel like you're going through imposter syndrome, there is something you can do about it, you can change can adapt your life, there will be risks involved, there will be a fears that come up. I took the leap and I left my job. I'm not saying that you need to leave your job. If you've got a family and kids and a mortgage etc, you may not be able to do this. What I am saying is, there is always an alternative if you feel pressure to be the kind of person that other people want you to be. It's because you're not thinking for yourself, you're internalizing what your real thoughts are. What I mean by that is, when I work with my clients, I make it about them. It's about them pushing forward so they can create the life they want.

It can only happen if you take the action required to get there. It took me a while to figure out what I wanted. I'm not going to lie. I'm not going to be like, Oh, yeah, I had it all figured out. No, it's taken me five years to get here. What I will say is that all journeys have a destination all of them and you need to find your destination sooner rather than later, so you can start living your career happiness.

If you want to find out how I can help you why not book a call here

 

 

 

 

 

Should you quit your job if you are unhappy at work?

Should you quit your job if you are unhappy at work?  It depends on the situation but sometimes it can be the release that some of the women I work with need. Having said that it’s not the solution for everyone because if there are financial obligations or children involved it’s not that simple. Especially if additional support systems are not in place like savings, family etc.

In the video above I address some the key factors to think about before you hand your notice in and whether it's the right choice for you. 

1, Why - What is the why behind your lack of enjoyment. Is it the people you work with, work environment, lack of progression etc. Make sure you take some time to really pinpoint the why behind the unhappiness and reasons for wanting to leave. if the reasons are manageable and you know you can't quit due to financial or family obligations then quitting may not be the answer for you. 

2. Possible solutions - Think about what solutions you can plan towards before you quit. Finding another job, changing your career. Doing another job which uses the transferable skills you have. Or if you are interested in going freelance and starting a business. Where can you get this support and who can you be networking with to help to plan towards this? Having some possible solutions in place will help keep you motivated towards a goal so you are not leaving a job without a strategy. it's important to think about what you think will help create your career happiness. 

3. A list of all the worst possible things that could happen. - Making this list is important to help you realise what your fears and anxieties are around quitting your job. It could be that when you read it back it's not actually that bad and maybe you are able to survive on your savings for a few months. Or maybe you are self sabotaging and feeling influenced by what others may say about you if you quit. However if you read it back and money is an issue or you have debts, mortgages and other things you are responsible for then maybe quitting is not the best case scenario for you right now. 

So should you quit the job you are unhappy in? This is really about your mindset and your capacity to thrive. If you know you have no other option and it's making miserable and causing you havoc maybe it is the right option. Having a plan is key here whether you can quit or not. It's possible you have to go through a bit of short term pain in order to reach your dream job. Either way I would say stay true to your convictions and follow your instincts because if you know there are bigger and better things are around the corner for you quitting your job could be the best you ever do. 

If you want to find out more about this and how I can help you further with your career mentoring needs please feel free to send me a message on the contact page http://www.thecareerhappinessmentor.com/contact-2/ or you can book a free 1 hour consultation with me at the following link https://soma-ghosh.youcanbook.me/ 

Go and seek your true definition of career happiness. 

Much Love 

Soma x 

 

What is your unique selling point?

I wrote a blog post about this on my original careers blog I started back in 2010. About your USP and how to use this to market your skills to stand out to employers. To read that post please go the following link http://careerscanbefun.blogspot.co.uk/2012/04/whats-your-uspunique-selling-point.html

That blog post was looking at helping graduates who were struggling to find out a job and thus using their unique selling point.

In this post, I want to share how you can use your unique selling point to get a job you really want. I will be sharing some key things to consider. Firstly, let’s look at what a unique selling point is. A USP is a marketing term used to sell products in business to see what makes them unique or different to what is already out there. One thing I see with a lot the women I work with is their ability to undermine their true talents and potential. I wanted to do this post because I believe everyone has something unique to bring to the table especially when job hunting or looking for a new job. So, I am sharing some tips on how you can tap into this.

1.       Write a list of the all the things that make you unique – Some of you may struggle with this one a little bit but think about what makes you different to other job candidates. Are you an avid fitness fanatic? Do you, do charity work at the weekends? Or maybe you sing in a choir or have done voluntary work in another country. The list may also include any abilities you have that go outside your work but could help you look favourable to an employer. For example, if you teach rock climbing somewhere and are going for an education based role this will show that your passionate for teaching and learning already. One of my unique skills is to write and I mentioned in my last interview my passion for writing and research in careers education which impressed by former employer.

2.       Are you Bilingual? – Speaking another language can help when applying to certain roles. So, if you do speak another language especially Mandarin, Spanish, Hindi, Arabic etc. Then don’t be afraid to include this on your CV or application. Most of the languages I have mentioned apart from English are some of the most widely spoken languages in the world. When I worked in Islington knowing my native language Bengali sometimes helped me speak to parents. Employers love Bilingual job candidates especially if travel is a huge part of the work you do.

3.       Bring your personality along for ride – Your personality is key to you getting the job you want. Depending on the company and its culture make sure to research that properly before you apply to a company or go for an interview. It’s important to make sure their values and culture will suit you as a person. When you submit your application, CV, interview or give a presentation make sure you are being 100% authentic. Its ok to show the real you obviously maintain professionalism but don’t shy away from showing your true personality. By me showing my passion for careers education in my last interview it got me a job.

4.       Business experience/ side project – If you haven’t been in a job for a while or have been in between jobs. Showing you have had a small start-up or side project can say heaps to a potential employer. You haven’t just been waiting for the right job you have been proactive and learning and building your own skills. It also shows you are a self-starter and most employers love people who are motivated and can start working as soon as possible. Enthusiasm is key to any job role.

Think about these 4 points to help draw out your unique selling points. Be a memorable job candidate who won’t easily be forgotten.

If you want to find out more about how I can support you why not join the Facebook group at the following link. https://www.facebook.com/groups/dreamjobsupportgroup/ 

If you need further support from me to find your next job lets chat and discuss how I can support you. To apply for a free 30 minute job hunting session please go to the following link https://soma-ghosh.youcanbook.me/.  

Much Love 

Soma x 

4 Reasons you may not be getting to the interview stage of your job hunt.

The struggle with many of the women I work with is getting through to the interview stage. They fill in the applications have a CV, write cover letters. They even join recruiters but they are still not getting called for any interviews. So why is this happening lets explore below. 

1. Lack of experience - If you lack experience in the field you are applying for or this isn't represented well on your CV or application. Then chances are an employer or recruiter may not want to take a chance on you, Employers are looking for candidates who have the right experience and can start doing the work straight away. The reason why experience is so important is because during your interview you may be asked for specific examples of how to perform the job role and without experience how can you do this. 

2. Their application - If your application form or CV doesn't best exhibit what you have to offer this could be the reason you aren't getting called for interviews. Please bear in mind though that your application needs to stand OUT. If you are playing it safe by only focusing on the essential skills and qualifications needed in the application your personal statement could be showing the difference between being good to being outstanding.  Show them you really want it by also exhibiting and highlighting examples for desirable skills they want too. You want to make an impact on a piece of paper and give them a need to want to meet you. 

3. Their qualifications - Qualifications are important for particular job roles. In fact the level of qualifications needed for certain job roles has become more standardized. For example if you are applying for HR or project management positions you may need particular qualification like the CIPD or the Prince 2 etc. Also to be a teacher or careers adviser it is a requirement you have a level postgraduate in education or careers advice or equivalent level 6 qualifications. Qualifications are great but try not just focus on them too much. You want to sound interesting and show off the experience, skills and knowledge you have. Not just the education you have.

4. Applying for the wrong type of job - I see so many women I work with apply for the wrong type of job roles. What I mean by this is they want a job so much they apply for the wrong type of job role that doesn't fit their skills or experience. The danger with this is if you are applying for the wrong type of job roles and can't evidence the experience you won't be called for an interview. 

So after reading this have you realized why you aren't getting to the interview stage yet. Do you feel you need more support around this. If so I would love to help you get there. To apply for free careers consultation please go to the following link  https://soma-ghosh.youcanbook.me/ . 

If you want further support around your career and job hunting why not join the closed Facebook group. https://www.facebook.com/groups/dreamjobsupportgroup/ 

Much Love

Soma x